Who Said Failure Is Not An Option?

How will you know that you’ve succeeded if you haven’t failed?

Fail fast and fail well! It’s my mantra that I discovered after age fifty, so it’s never too late.

I ask what is so terrible about failing? I know, it’s to say, “I failed.” It’s feeling unsuccessful as if that moment defines our entire life as a success or failure.

How do you view regret? Do you learn from failure? Do you recognize and allow that learning? It’s similar to allowing the child to touch a hot stove or flame. I could never do this, but really, if you get burned, do you do it again? And there’s the quote attributed to Einstein, but actually said by civil rights activist Rita Mae Brown, or maybe someone else in literature long ago.' "Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

How do you deal with regret? Do you allow it to infiltrate your mindset and take over so you can’t go forward? Or does it motivate you?

Failure is complex. You won’t wish for it, and you won’t have to. If you take risks, it will happen. Then what? We have to learn that our only competition is ourselves. How do we evaluate our own actions? Do we allow ourselves vague affirmations? Do we excuse things, or are we brutally honest and self-effacing? Is there a productive middle ground?

Constructive criticism is a tool for growth.You have to be truthful with yourself. You always know the truth, whether you engage in honest self reflection or not. Allow yourself this opportunity. Don’t give yourself phony affirmations telling yourself how wonderful you are. These words are superficial and nonproductive.

When it comes to self-evaluation, you don’t have to view failure as failure. It can be another step on the path. Do you think you have done your best? Do you have to be the best, or do you recognize there is always someone better? How does that intersect or overlap with your motivation?

While thinking one should only compete with oneself, it leads me to ask how to improve. Who do you measure yourself against, and how do you evaluate what is failure and what is success? It is best to bounce back immediately and try again, and combine that

with some processing and truth. Do you decide what is good enough, or do you always strive beyond?

To allow failure to lead to success, you have to define what success is for you. There is no one-size-fits-all success. One person’s success is not another person’s success. Given your talents and potential, have you arrived, or do you continue to reach further? Are you willing to follow rules, break rules, or create new ones? Does being a decent person and contributing to your community and your family matter in your idea of success? Or is it all about money?

I won't argue that money doesn't make you feel successful, but do you reflect on, or measure how or what you did to get it? Did you help someone or hurt someone? Are you giving back?

Herein lie the lessons of failure. It teaches us who we want to be and how we want the world to view us. It can be the great equalizer and the source of our greatest joy. Do you accept failure, or do you allow it to kick you into gear?

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